darkness

embraced by inner darkness
I warm myself by the last ember
of light

                          fear circles my soul
like starving wild animals
                 as my soul cries out for solace
                                                 craving peace
                                                     desiring love
                                                       hoping for connection

                                          love

                            hope


how does "afraid of the dark"
                 work
when the darkness has settled
          in ones
                        heart

how does darkness
change
who I am
who I was
who I will be
...who I am

how does darkness
change
once I embrace it
after I integrate it into my being

when I stop hiding from it

how do I

change

who was

where
I 

am

how do I
change

where I was

when
I

am

here

shadows wisp around my feet
grasping at the edges of my psyche
tickling the hems of my mind

                     looking for fuel

to burst into a raging fire
                               filling my mind with terrifying
                    anxious
                    mind-buzzing


    trepidation


The wards
              set centuries ago
tremble
       and waver
    and crumble

they were placed
in fear
and cannot

truly

hold back the onslaught

      of

what is right
what is sacred
what is holy
...what is right

      Releasing that which no longer serves
Setting free what doesn't work
           Relinquishing my death grip on what isn't providing
                              isn't useful
                                          doesn't sustain
Allowing it to flow
          to where it would go
             to connect to its purpose

So I can call in mine

Possibly...

Hold on to possibility

Release and release and release again

Until all that we have 

has been

 transformed into all that we need

Until all that we need becomes all that we have

Plant the seeds of future growth

In the fertile soil of today’s preparation

Be here now

Now be here

Be

Here

Now

Until now is then

Until then is held in the palm of the hands of now

Until all that there is

Is present

Choosing the path that is going the direction travelled

And going the direction the path is travelling

Possibility is the seed of all that is

The seed that encodes the very growth of my future

That holds the heartache

The laughter

The jubilance

The terror

The entire essence of my being

The cusp of the pass

The turning points of good and bad choices

The culmination of

Ecstatic weeping

Desperate rejoicing

And angels dancing on heads of pins

Until there is nothing more to do than gather the fruit of who I am

Harvest the propagations of expectations

That have combined into an amassed silo of Be-ing

To sift through and discover the seeds of possibility

To sow into the future path of forever